1st May 2010

The aliens among us

posted in Alaska, Garden, OmegaDotter, Spring |

Spring has finally arrived Chez OmegaMom.  The snow has completely melted from the yard.  Robins are serenading us in the morning and deep into the “night”.  The gloaming is creeping up; it is 11 p.m. as I write this, and it’s still late twilight outside—sunrise was at 5:51 a.m., sunset at 10:05 p.m.  The trees and shrubbery are filled with leaf buds, which I swear seem to grow as you watch.  You can definitely see the changes from day to day.

Within a few weeks, all the houses on all the streets in our area will be hidden from view again by the riotous abundance of greenery surrounding them.

And, as happens each spring, the rhubarbs get a hard-on.  Thick, red, hard penile stubs emerge from the ground in clumps and look infinitely pornographic for a few days.

Then the hard-ons explode into wildly wrinkled, alien looking baby leaves.  A week or so later, suddenly the plants look like ordinary rhubarbs:  the aliens have vanished.

It’s an amazing transformation.

Alas, the pics we had of the hard-on stage were out of focus, but here we have some aliens emerging from the penile cocoon:

alien growth!

Here’s a more pornographic looking item; imagine it without its crinkled taffeta skirt:

porno growth

Brains for the vegetarian zombies:

Braaaaaaiiiiinnnnssss

The rhubarb plants give my hubby and me something to giggle about in delayed adolescence.  Then, later in the year, they give my hubby rhubarb to make pies.

I, unfortunately, am not fond of rhubarb pie.  Hopefully we’ll be able to ship one off to OmegaGranny.

Aside from that, I have been walking in the mornings, enjoying the sunshine, the explosion of growth, the rich smells of moist dirt and growing things.  And getting mosquito bites—of course.  And raking—endlessly—the yard, in bits and pieces.

There are currently 5 responses to “The aliens among us”

  1. 1 On May 2nd, 2010, Miss Cellania said:

    You couldn’t pay me to eat rhubarb, but I would love to see it deploy its leaves!

  2. 2 On May 2nd, 2010, Catalyst said:

    Ah, the BRD makes a great strawberry/rhubarb pie and I love it!

  3. 3 On May 2nd, 2010, Jean Woodman said:

    My father and I were rhubarb pie lovers. My father was always looking for the right long pan so he could finally make a Long Rhubarb Pie. Unfortunately we were always forced to fall back on to the usual round version. Yours is ahead of ours so far - ours has barely broken ground here in Chicago Area. Ah, Rhubarb-Strawberry Sauce for the cold winter nights.

  4. 4 On May 2nd, 2010, GrannyJ said:

    I recall those rhubarb plants in August — speaking of gigantic aliens just waiting to overpower one! As for the rhubarb pie — any time, kiddo, any time. The more, the merrier.

  5. 5 On April 16th, 2011, OmegaMom said:

    [...] show little red pen1ses, just the very starts of the explosion of greenery to come.  I posted pictures last year from about two weeks later, and you can see how they end up looking like weird red brains before [...]

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