Drowning in the undertow
OmegaDotter and I are slated to go visit GrannyJ between Christmas and New Year’s. OmegaBro will be there with his family, so we’ll have plenty of fun—lots of visiting, good eats, hanging out, playing with cousins, day trips.
Last year, my visit to Arizona was before Christmas. The year before, it was before Christmas. This year, it is after.
And, oh, lordy, what a difference it makes.
I have hit the wall. I am drowning in the darkness. I held out as long as I could, and was in fairly good spirits. Somewhere in the past week, however, my body recognized that It Is Dark, and shut down. I wake up and am totally, absolutely exhausted. I could sleep all day long. When I’m awake, I feel like I’m just going through the motions. And today the tide of darkness swept over me, and all I felt was miserable. Totally, absolutely, miserable. Lead ball in the stomach miserable. Bitchy, snappy, petty, angry, and underneath it all, on the verge of tears miserable.
Yes, the Magic Light
Yes, the solstice is coming, and soon the light will be growing and the darkness will be shrinking. But right now, that doesn’t help.
This is the time when I need to be going somewhere with more than six hours of daylight, with the sun more than 6 degrees over the horizon. Rumor has it that the Nords and the Swedes are grim and gloomy during the winter—I can totally relate.
Just four weeks. I can handle four weeks. Two weeks to the solstice, three weeks until I’m in Arizona for a week, then back here and the days will start getting longer.
posted in Alaska, Arizona, Winter | 8 Comments
