How to be a cowgirl
posted in Alaska, Family, Fun Stuff, OmegaDotter, Parenting, Pop Culture |"Hi! I’m Rachael Ray! Today, I’m not going to be teaching you about food–I’m going to teach you about farms!"
She flourishes a pink cowgirl hat…whispers, "You’re a teenager…"
"Now! You’re a teenager! And you have a job. And you want to be a cowgirl. And you want to be married. And you want to be a teenager."
Mommy: "Hi. I want to be a cowgirl."
"Okay! You want to be a cowgirl. And you’re a teenager! And that’s okay. Now, after you get married, you can become a cowgirl! And go to your job. And come back and be a cowgirl!"
She pushes the cowgirl hat onto mommy’s head.
"You need a cowgirl hat to be a cowgirl! Now you’re a cowgirl! But you are still a teenager. And you’re getting married! Cowgirls can be married!"
She gestures to the "stable".
"You have horses! This is Kayla and this is Spot. Kayla’s kind of shy, so be gentle! You need to feed them some oats. And some hay. This is how they eat!"
Kayla (formerly Frankie) nibbles from her hand.
Mommy suggests that maybe they need a feed bucket.
She grabs a box from Lands End.
"Now! This is for their food! What are the oats? The purple socks are the oats! And the white–orange–socks are the hay! And now we’re going to feed the horses!"
She grabs a bright orange plastic school bus and drags it in front of "Spot" (the wooden rocking horse).
"Now, Spot is a pony, a shepherd pony. But that’s okay!" (For the uninitiated, "shepherd" is a confused Shetland.)
"Now we’re going to give them some treats!"
And on and on from there…
Rachael Ray, I have to say, is everywhere. A few weeks ago, I had no idea who Rachael Ray was, or that she was everywhere. However, a few weeks ago, we lugged the second TV upstairs to the living room and plugged it in to the cable. The first station that showed up? The Food Network. The dotter was mesmerized.
We haven’t bothered to figure out how to change the station.
She laughs at and with Paula (just watching Paula puts pounds on your hips, trust me; I think Paula could deep-fry everything), but she adores Rachael Ray. And now, when we go out shopping, she sees Rachael Ray on everything. There are Rachael Ray Triscuits. Rachael Ray on cereal boxes. Rachael Ray on magazine covers. Rachael Ray being interviewed on TVs in department stores. Trust me, this woman is everywhere. And, trust me, the dotter sees her where-ever she is.
The dotter also announced this morning that Hannah Montana was "the grrrreatest rock star ever!" We quickly disabused her of this notion. Or tried to. OmegaDad claimed Elvis. I said The Who or Eric Clapton or anyone else but HM. The dotter promptly said:
"Okay! Elvis is number two! Hannah Montana is number one!"
Ahem. No, that’s not what we said…
So right now, the dotter wants to be a cowgirl/rockstar/cook/girl who does hair when she grows up.
In other news. The doc-in-a-box xrayed me, did the blood test thing, tsk-tsked over my cholesterol levels, said my blood sugar was just fine, told me about his lead sled dog whose name is Paxil, wrote me some painkilling prescriptions and sent me on my way. (Can I just say how neat is it that the doc-in-a-box has a sled-dog team?)
He kept insisting it was arthritis pain, and when I’d say it was an electric shock would repeat back to me that it was a stabbing pain. No, that’s not what I said, dammit! I know a stabbing pain and I know an electric shock type of pain, and I know the difference. And I sure as heck know the difference between arthritic pain and nerve pain. But, hey, I’ll give the prescriptions a try and rest reassured that I’m not about to explode with hypo- or hyperglycemia.
And in the biggest news…
The best news…
Today? Today on the weather page? Where it says how much daylight there is hereabouts?
Today, rather than a "loss", it was a "gain". Of 2 seconds.
WOOT!!! Yes, folks, today marks the solstice. From here on out, until June 21 or thereabouts, we’ll be gaining sunlight.
OmegaMom does the Snoopy Dance out the door.
