Fashion senseless
Okay. We have a new house. I need to decorate. I have some very specific ideas.
Apparently, my very specific ideas are out of step with the home improvement fashion industry–or perhaps the fashion industry in general.
After all, I think baby-doll tops are too, too ’70s for words. And they make every woman who wears them look pregnant or fat. Have you looked at any apparel stores lately? Tell me what you see. (Blog reader, blog reader, what do you see? I see baby dolls surrounding me…) Let’s put it this way: last year, there were no baby doll tops. This year, it seems there is nothing else.
No, I’m not planning to decorate the house in baby doll tops. But the proliferation of BDTs is a symptom of what I’m about to complain about.
Each of those BDTs is brown. Or muddy green. Or a kind of putrid pumpkin orange. Or a dim blue. Or a combination of any or all of the above.
It’s well-known that at the beginning of the fashion year, planning a year out, an elite group of sorcerers psychics gurus madmen fashion color consultants meets to decide what are going to be the in and trendy colors next year.
I read an article about this meeting, and these consultants claim (apparently with a straight face) that they are not dictating the colors to be used, they are predicting, based on current trends, what colors will be popular.
You will not be surprised to find that OmegaMom finds this a truly hilarious concept. OmegaMom is firmly in the camp of conspiratorial thinkers who despise the color psychotics fashion color consultants because she thinks they are a portion of the Illuminati Conspiracy To Rule The World And Crush Free Thinking.
Anyway, there I am, wanting to decorate, with some very specific ideas and colors in mind. Are any of the colors I am interested in available? Or the designs? Hah. No, what is available is the 2007 version of the ubiquitous avocado and mustard. Dim, murky colors. Gloomy. Dark. Bah.
I was able to find some lovely bright colors for our bedroom. We’re going to paint it light sage and splash all this color around.
We found the (ugh) pale pink for the dotter’s bedroom, but trying to find, say, pink curtains is an exercise in futility…well, okay, I can find pink sheer curtains. Whoop-de-damned-do. I’m not going to put sheers on these windows, if you please; come next July, that kind of insanity would dump us all into the nuthouse ASAP.
But. Bright colors for towels? Nope. And, having decided to indulge my girly-girl side with a little frill and frippery, my search for lavender and pink towels, plus a fabric shower curtain with flowers that are lavender and pink, has come to naught.
I went looking at sofas today. Every damned piece of furniture at the store was dark. Dark wood. Dark sheets. Dark sofa upholstery. Dark brown and gold and green rugs.
Bah. Picture OmegaMom muttering dire curses and shaking her fist at the cabal of fashion color consultants (servants of the Illuminati).
posted in Frustration, Pop Culture, The Move | 13 Comments
