Comments on: Silence http://omegamom.com/2005/12/01/silence/ A "good enough" mom muses about alpha moms, adoption, computers, the State Of The World, Internet quirkiness, and the Kosmik All Tue, 06 Jan 2009 10:08:49 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: LizC http://omegamom.com/2005/12/01/silence/#comment-41 LizC Fri, 02 Dec 2005 08:41:00 +0000 http://omegamom.com/?p=25#comment-41 my OmegaDaughter comes from the province involved, in fact from one of the orphanages listed in the articles I read. Makes me sick to think that she might not have really been an abandoned heathen waif that we could rescue.... oh, wait... Really. Our orphanage-specific list has had a lot of discussion of the articles, though of course no one knows what to do about them. I think about all the documentation we got with the adoption-- and I have always wondered if the "finding place" and the name of the person who found her was a total fabrication-- especially the "finding ad" that was placed in a newspaper, looking for her bio family (which did not come to us from the officials, but which we do have). What if the newspaper was just nowhere near the people who were looking for her? Ugh. Makes me sick. I guess the best we can do a this point is to be clear with our kids about our intentions, our part in the whole system. Be clear about all the possibilities, as well, when the kid is old enough to understand, and gulp hard when the child gets pissed off. Then help her figure out what she needs to do about it. It is so ugly. All of it is so ugly. my OmegaDaughter comes from the province involved, in fact from one of the orphanages listed in the articles I read. Makes me sick to think that she might not have really been an abandoned heathen waif that we could rescue…. oh, wait…

Really. Our orphanage-specific list has had a lot of discussion of the articles, though of course no one knows what to do about them.

I think about all the documentation we got with the adoption– and I have always wondered if the “finding place” and the name of the person who found her was a total fabrication– especially the “finding ad” that was placed in a newspaper, looking for her bio family (which did not come to us from the officials, but which we do have). What if the newspaper was just nowhere near the people who were looking for her? Ugh. Makes me sick.

I guess the best we can do a this point is to be clear with our kids about our intentions, our part in the whole system. Be clear about all the possibilities, as well, when the kid is old enough to understand, and gulp hard when the child gets pissed off. Then help her figure out what she needs to do about it.

It is so ugly. All of it is so ugly.

]]> By: bh http://omegamom.com/2005/12/01/silence/#comment-40 bh Thu, 01 Dec 2005 18:42:00 +0000 http://omegamom.com/?p=25#comment-40 The articles are pretty disturbing. And depressing, especially since there is no way of knowing how frequent it is. Our daughter was adopted 4 years ago; there is no way that she will not know the facts one day. Even if we tried, we could not keep it from her. We won't ignore those articles. But how to deal with it? I just don't know. I guess finding out as much information as possible. The articles are pretty disturbing. And depressing, especially since there is no way of knowing how frequent it is.

Our daughter was adopted 4 years ago; there is no way that she will not know the facts one day. Even if we tried, we could not keep it from her. We won’t ignore those articles. But how to deal with it? I just don’t know. I guess finding out as much information as possible.

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